Translations of CCFS

watching episodes in chicago, i question why they portray nature of colorado with high snowy mountains and arizona with red rocks and trees more natural to arizona…
chicago is very flat and different nature … i am very confused on that part…

Dear Ms Puddle,

A few weeks ago I startet watching Candy the anime, after nearly 30 years. I wanted to dive into childhood memories and remember my beloved grandmother, who used to send me the tapes from Greece to Germany, she missed not one episode. I’m still overwhelmed by her love, her effort to give me strenght and a the right view for life. By having Candy as an example, everything was possible.
But deep inside, after so many years, there still had to be a solution. Why did Candy have to seperate from Terry? And what was going on with Albert? Why did the anime end like this?
I sensed that there was something in this story but as a child I couldn’t grap it.
And as I watched it , after so many years, except of that incredibly beautiful drawings, which could make visible every emotion, I recognized for the first time Keiko Nagitas magnitude of storytelling.

It has to be very deeply understood, what incredible storyteller Keiko Nagita is and she has to be treated as a very serious writer. Having recognized this , the key to understand what she wants to say to us is to understand her and her writing itself, to break down her storytelling. At first this sounds like taking magic away but I think it will reveal it instead.
So, how does Keiko Nagita write?

In my opinion, to answer this question, someone has to use the anime an not the novel, CCFS. Because in CCFS she doesn‘t use all her skill, for the most part. She uses it a little when Candy sits in the room alone with her thougts and her memories. In the time between, in the narration, she rushes through the pages without taking a breath. I think she did that because she knew that we would have all the pictures in our mind, that we would fill in the plot holes.It would be an exhausting work to reproduct the whole story with the same inensity as in the anime, it’s impossible. And she loves the story that arlready exists in the anime, exactly as it is, except of some crucial parts, that is what I believe. But she needed, as a writer, to write it again, the keyparts , just to remind her all the emotions, all the tragedy so she could finally reach the epilogue.
After that rushing she slows down to the letters. Here she fills out some plot holes, the necessary ones, but it is not the only reason she writes the letters. I have the feeling that she wants to remember every beloved character. She, the writer, is saying good bye to her beloved friends by remembering them, every single one, for a last time. And then comes the epiloge, were she releases all her skill, there she nearly crushes us with her magic, whith all its force.

So, who is Keiko Nagita, what are the her methods , her tools? I will show a few examples:

1.) She loves every caracter, every single one from the bottom of her heart. So she treats them as they should be treated, with respect. It will appear later why this is so important.

2.) One of the strongest methods she uses to hold tension alive, to make it real, is foreshadowing.

– When Anthony died we already knew that it was possible, we prayed it wouldn’t happen but it happend. But how did we know? The cards oft he fortune teller had told us. We sruggeled like Candy not to accept this possibility, but it happened.
– In Scotland in Summer, Stair revealed his passionate love for aeroplanes for the first time. It was the most beatiful day, where they, all together, achieved something marvellous by making the aeroplane fly. But Stair crushed with the aeroplane, and that happend later a second time with Candy after her graduation. So at war, this fatal day, at sunset, when the aeroplanes in France flew into the sky and the enemy appeared in the sky , outnumbering Stairs party, a crush suddenly seemed so possible it made your heart burst from agony.
And something else happened too, that summer in Scotland. While building the aeroplane Terry saved Archie from the large Pulley thet fell off the roof, the same thing Susanna did for him later. Even at the sunniest summerday there ist he prominition of tragedy, like a slight thin layer that is there, we feel it, but we are not counciously aware of it. This is great storytelling.

3.) The other method, so strong that it speaks for itself is symbolism. Nagita uses that in an extrordynary way.

– Anthony ist he white rose, the platonic love of a pure heart
– Terrys roses, the ones he is covered with when his fans throw them towards him, when he enters his horse drawn carriage with Susanna after King Lear are red. He is the passionate love ,he is eros.

4.) Every single character has his carakter arc. This applies only to the good ones, the ones who wanted to evolve to a better person, who chose the path of sacrifice. The bad ones, like Neil and Eliza never changed, because they always believed that only there where right, they insisted on their point of view, never tried to understand themselves and the others, and so they had no journey, no life, just emptyness.

This is Nagitas motive, her intention , to show the path to real love, to show the path to paradise, it is the journey towards light. It will become clear what I mean, but it is important to know the core, the heart of the story and this is always the writer itself and what is driving them.

So these are the most important tools. But it mostly happens visually, not through words but through action and symbolism. And so
5.) this ist another tool: Show , don’t tell. The reader hast o understand by action and not through words.

For me, this is Nagita, the way she thinks. And that is why I believe that it is not that important , which political situation exists while Candy is sitting in the room, the name oft he River, the fact that lakewood was sold. I think she just wanted to blur the lines so we would be forced to follow another path.

BREAKING THE MAGIC

So now I start breaking the magic with this tools , (like Stair who broke and fixed things constantly 😉

Anthony:
Anthony was the platonic gentle love that could have been pure joy, but we know he is not the Prince oft he Hill. This is a stain, a silent pain in the heart but is there, but still we just want to ignore it, as Candy does, as Antony himself does. That is foreshadowing, that they won’t be together. Nagita loves every single caracter and this wouldnt be fair for Antony, to be loved because he looked like someone beloved. Candy says that it’s him that she likes and it’s true, but the Prince oft he Hill will always be a shadow between them. And this becomes clear, a few seconds before Anthony died. He was deeply hurt when he asked Candy and she told him that he looked like the Prince and one day she wanted to meet him. His eyes lost their sparkle. A few moments later the accident occured and Anthony died.
But why did he die? Nagita is not a sloppy and lazy writer who kills a caracter just to cause heartbreak or because the caracter doesn’t fit in the plot anymore. She loves every single one of them. So, why did Anthony die?
In my opinion Anthony had completed his journey towards light. He was the boy of a rich family, who could have everything with just a glimpse of his eye. But instead of that, he wanted to earn everything he got, he wanted to become a real man. And the one who gave him the oppotunity to achive this was Tom. Anthony fought with Tom, chopped wood, tamed horses, won the Rodeo and for the first time he spent the money he earned himself, sharing his achievement with someone he loved. In this young age Anthony already had reached the peak of his journey. His loving gentle heart had become brave and strong, flying high like an eagle. Sister Lane said once to the boy who constructed crosses for everyone in the orphanage „only God decides when it’s time for us to die“. That is why Anthony died.

Stair:
Almost the same applies to Stair, too. He wanted to defend his country and the people he loved through fighting. He wanted to stand up as a man, like Anthony did, but Stair did it in an older age. But Stair did go one step further. It was only when he realised that the enemy is his brother, is someones best friend, only when he decided not to kill and sacrifying himself, when his journey came to the end, when he reached light. Thats why his officer , Rolf Baughman said: „I have been informed that his plane rather than rushing was as if it had immersed itself into the sun“. Thast is not poetic, it’s symbolic and it’s meant litteraly for his soul, that had become light (in both meanings) through sacrifice.

Terry:
Oh Terry. I will never overcome the scene on the stairway…
Candy was the one to reach his heart, the only one who could enter. But still, he remained self – involved, in his own thoughts , in his own world, still not paying attention to the people around him.. If he had payed attention he would have recognised the pain he was causing Susanna. It wasn’t his fault but if he had payed attention, if he had been more sensitive, maybe he could have prevented the tragedy, had at least somehow reliefed her pain. But he didn’t. Only through heartbreak, only when his heart was scattered in thousand pieces , only when he had reached the bottom of his existence, he bacame humble and took over his resposibility. He didn’t do it by himself like Anthony. Only then he understood the deep pain of others, when he expererienced it himself. That is how live is, everything we learn we learn through pain. But we have to go through it and dont’t remain there. That is what Terry did, at the end. He collected his scattered heart and stood on his feet. That is something that demands more than courage. Deep inside there always had been this kindness, but well hidden under a thin layer of arrogance and hurted selfishness , but this layer had to be scattered to make light shine through. He needed Candy to love her and than he needed Candy to get his heart broken.
For Candy Terry was passionate love, he was eros. It was a very physical relationship from the beginning, he teased her bacause of her freckels, he watched( or didn’t watch as he claimed) her undress, kissed her and afterwards they hurt eachother by slapping their faces. We always think that this is how real love is, but this kind of love is like the wild sea , high waves that can drown you. It’s not impossible but very hard to reach the harbour with such a storm to go through. Both could have endured all this pain that comes with passion but it would have been a long and exhausting journey.

And here comes Candy. How much more should she fight , how much more sacrifice, how much more pain should she endure to reach the peaceful harbour?

Candy:
Candy’s journey is towards the light, too. But Candy fought and sacrificed herself from the beginning , she was light and hope and happyness for everyone around her. So what is her journey?
When Candy met Anthony she also met Albert at the waterfall, after he had saved her. But his face was covered under his beard. Someone could say, that this was a trick for the anime to hide his face, because the similarity to Anthony would have been too obvious . I think it served this pourpouse too. But it’s also, and more important, symbolic. She wasn’t ready to see his face because she wouldn’t have recognized him, who he really is. In a deep and undenyable way, who he is.Having known Terry and having become older she meets Albert without beard but with sunglasses covering his eyes, the doors of the soul. Symbolically she still wasn’t able to recognize him. It’s only at the time she is about to lose Terry, through heartbreak, through tragedy, when his face is revealed to her, when she starts to know him. And I don’t mean by that neither the Prince oft he Hill , nor Uncle William , not even Albert himself.

Who is Albert?
This ist he most crucial question, I believe. And the key to this question is the most symbolic scene in the whole anime. All storys , little or big, had a reason, a beginning and an ending, an actual reason why they existed. The most huge scene, but with no further explanation, was the scene with the lion.
With one gesture, one picture, the true identity of Albert is revealed. Risking his own life, ready to sacrifice it, to protect a wild animal from beeing harmed, he has the power to tame it. And I’m asking, how many wild animals did Candy tame, risking her life?
There was Garcia , the alkoholic, mexican coward who , through her love and courage, changed so much that he was ready to sacrifice his life for her. There was Mr. Carson , and there was Charlie, the prisoner with the paperflowers. There was Mr McGregor, her first patient, and there was Terry. All wild animals, but with the magesty of a lion in their hearts, who changed through her love and sacrifice. So who is Albert?
Albert is her equal. In every dimension .
But not only her equal. The symbolism is huge. He is the master of the world, not because of his wealth (another symbolism) but because of his love for every creature under the sky, like Adam in Eden, like Daniel in the lions den. This ist he kind of love he has to offer. He understands her and she understands him because they have the same „spiritual frequency“ , they live in the same world, they speak the same language. When Albert revealed himself to Candy at Lakewood, there is no tension , no anxiety , but tranquility, noone is trying to conquer one another, they know that there is something that connects them, the invisible thread.
Nagita did the same thing in her epilogue, too, but in a more subltle way. This time Albert does’t tame a lion but reunites two animals, Ceasar and Cleopatra (another epical love) who he knows suffered from seperation, exactly as Candy always made everyone come closer to eachother.

This is who he is. But which is his caracter? How does he express himself? He is doing it by action. At the House of Magnolia he cookes for her, he cares for her. He always speaks by aktion. He acts symbolic. When they sat at the grass and he offers her the half oft his sandwich he says:“ Lets give a promise to each other, to share the good and tha bad times“ . It’s a symbolic gesture accompanied with words that are said at a wedding. Candy realizes the huge impact of these words, but she can‘t totally understand it. Because what does Albert do? He is wearing his sunglasses, hiding his eyes behind them, because it is not time to reveal his true feelings, he can’t be shure how Candy feels about him.

Nearly the same thing happened when, after having found Terry drunk, he leads him to Candy at Dr Martins Happy Clinic. He asks Terry : Don’t you want to see Candy?
This huge gesture, after nearly 30 years, hit me like a lightning. He stepped back to leave the way free for Terry , even if that meant loosing, just in a glance, the love of his life. But this is the magnitude of his spiritual greatness. But at the moment he offers that to Terry, he is wearing his glasses, hiding, holding himself back. That is how he acts.

EPILOGUE

Having said all this, analized how Nagita thinks and writes, I’ll show you the only way I can read the epilogue. We have to follow the invisible thread, the meanings behind the words of Alberts and Candys correspondence. This is the point where Nagita reveals all her skills.

Albert and Candy love eachother but they have to be very careful aproaching one another. They are standing at the same place but what place is that? They have the same secret longing but they don’t shout it out loud because they don’t want to destroy their bond by hurting one another. They have to unfold gently one anothers heart and they will stop wherever the other wants to . And they are doing it by pulling gently the invisible thread to see what melody the strings of their souls will play. The epilogue is music to my ears.

In the first letter Candy uses all his names, Prince oft he Hill, Albert, Great Uncle William. She is confused and intimidated. But she uses all his names by purpose. Letter by letter one name after the other is disappearing. Albert rejects Grat Unkle William and Prince of the Hill. The one is unbaerable and the other gives him the shivers. And Candy accepts that by saying she will never let him bear anything. And then, gently but certain, with emphasis,she challanges him to chose between beautiful and adopted daughter.
„Your beautiful adopted daughter“ is pure disharmony. It sounds like a scratch. She pushes him gently to restore harmony again. But what kind of harmony will it be? He defenitely chooses beautiful but is again hiding himself by teasing her with a maybe. Because there is another hidden fear of him. The adoptive father is a fact but he takes it with humor, like it‘s not a real obstacle. So the melody is still playing…
And then Albert does something that must have cost him a lot. He offers her the name Bert. It is his greatest fear, the name of a brother. It’s short, it sounds not well, it reduces him to something he doesn’t want to be. It’s weak, like a last breath, that is how it sounds.
And what does Candy? After she feels honored she never uses this name again. It’s in her last letter that she rejects it, after they have met at the Lakehouse at the meantime. Because now, Candy knows about Albert feelings:

(… ) “And later we went to that room…the same room where I realized who you really were. On the writing desk was my diary. You…you wanted to return it to me…‘Because this…is something valuable toyou.’You murmured those words looking out of the window. Your voice was so quiet…My diary speaks almost entirely about Terry, and I have even often meditated on what I would have donewith it. That diary is here at this moment, close to me, but I have never opened it again and I intend to give it back to you, just as you gave me back the badge which I once returned to you.” (…)

With this gesture Albert revelas his love to her. He returns her diary to her. She gave it to him but not to Albert but to Great Uncle William, so it shouldn’t be in his possession. And what does Candy? She intends to give it back to him, without having opened it again. This a symbolic aktion from Candy, it is her heart, that belongs totally to him, with all the scars but with definite closure tot he past.
The same thing applies to the Badge. It is Alberts heart. Once lost without beeing aware of it to a little girl and is now returned back to her conciously . Candy knows now what he meant by that gesture and does the same with her diary , her heart, because she knows the language that Albert is speaking.

In his last letter to her, Albert said, that in the future he wants to make sure that Candy finds happiness. But Candy, now, knows for shure , after this day in Lakewood that Albert loves her and what was her reply?

(…) “Yes, Albert: this is my happiness, now. ” (…)

My happiness doesn’t lie in the past nor in the future but now, with you. She is saying
„I love you“. And this „Yes“ is so strong, so out oft he blue, like the answer to an unspoken proposal, that lies between lines and gestures. That is why there is no other correspondence between them , because from that moment on they never parted.

Because that is what Candy experienced that day at Lakewood: Anthony was the white rose, Terry the red, but Albert is:

(…) “The drive to Lakewood has been wonderful!The lupines, or rather the bluebonnets, the black-eyed-susans, the lace flowers and the wild chervil…The road was flanked by a lot of flowers and you were so astonished while I was murmuring the name of each one of them. Thank you for admiring me so much.
The wind that was coming through the open window was so pleasant and while you were driving, you were singing that popular Scottish song, and I was completely ecstatic listening to it”. (…)

Albert ist the whole garden. She is there, where life and eternity meet, she sees the light. She has come to the end of her journey, with Albert in the Garden of eternity.

(…)The meadow, surrounded by multiflora roses, was full of bluebells and the bright and twinkling afternoon light seemed almost to draw a border between this life and eternity.(…)

Nagita is totally aware of this kind of love, this is her heart, the core of her story, her deep understanding of the soul. I can’t help but think about this, from Dostojevsky’s Brothers Karamazov:

(…)The more you succeed in loving, the more you’ll be convinced of the existence of God and the immortality of your soul.(…)

That is what Candy is all about.

KEIKO NAGITA

Nagita loves her caracters from the bottom of her heart. And she treats them with deep respect. Could a character like Albert just vanish? Could there be any doubt any shadow between him and Candy? Could he ever be the second choice for a woman and would he ever accept that? Would Candy ever be that dishonest to move forward with someone without a closure to the past? In the anime the decision for closure is given to Terry, when he decides not to meet her at the Clinik of Dr. Martin. But the closure had to be fulfilled from Candy, and so did Nagita in the novel. When no obstacle was there anymore she still chose him. Even Shakespear wasn’t a threat anymore. Shakespare is a friend who holds a secret, like Dostojevski:

Juliet:
O Romeo, Romeo! wherefore art thou Romeo?
Deny thy father and refuse thy name;
Or, if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love,
And I’ll no longer be a Capulet

Romeo:
[Aside] Shall I hear more, or shall I speak at this?

Juliet:
‘Tis but thy name that is my enemy;
Thou art thyself, though not a Montague.
What’s Montague? It is nor hand, nor foot,
Nor arm, nor face, nor any other part
Belonging to a man. O, be some other name!
What’s in a name? That which we call a rose
By any other name would smell as sweet;
So Romeo would, were he not Romeo call’d,
Retain that dear perfection which he owes
Without that title. Romeo, doff thy name,
And for that name which is no part of thee
Take all myself.

Romeo:
I take thee at thy word:
Call me but love, and I’ll be new baptized;
Henceforth I never will be Romeo.

Nagita intentionally blurred the lines. But not to cheat with the ending. She left it to us to unfold the story to the extend we could bear , she left it to us to discover the unvisible thread, to reach the heart oft he story.