More than words (Part 1)

If someone tells you the following:

When children cry, they often seek their parents for comfort.
Now, you see a lady crying, and she seeks a man for comfort.
As he pulls her into his loving arms, will you assume the man is her father?

Common sense tells you this is not necessarily true. 😉 This form of argument is invalid, and it’s a common logical fallacy known as affirming the consequent. Below is a very simple example of such fallacy:

If he’s lying, he will sweat.
He’s sweating.
So, he’s lying.

Likewise, some people say children in Japan often write to their parents “with love and gratitude”.
Candy wrote her last letter to Albert “with love and gratitude”.

You won’t jump to conclusion either, right? 😛 For your interest, please read The person I love why I believe Candy was in love with Albert by then. Please read the comments too if you like as many of them are brilliant! 🙂

In any case, we are not supposed to read a story out of context. In Candy Candy Final Story (CCFS), as mentioned in Her happiness, Albert wrote a heartfelt letter to Candy from São Paulo in the early hours of the morning, in which he said he could never thank Candy enough, and from now on, he would strive to find out where her happiness was. Note that he didn’t mean “where” as in a location or place, but he meant “where in her heart”.

After reading such a lengthy letter, Candy was apparently touched and replied a short letter to him, as described in I wish you were here… Some time after that, Albert appeared at Pony’s Home one day, paying yet another sudden visit. This time, as though Albert wanted to fulfill Candy’s birthday wish, he spent a whole day with her, driving her to his family villa in Lakewood. Candy wrote many things about this trip in her subsequent letter to Albert as if she didn’t want to forget any detail of that, and if you read this particular letter in its entirety, it was indeed filled with love and gratitude. 🙂 💞

Similar to the last letter Judy Abbott wrote in “Daddy-Long-Legs”, a love letter full of gratitude to Master Jervie, the last letter to Albert from Candy is also a love letter, no less.

As a matter of fact, I have a strong feeling that her letter to Albert is indeed the last letter from Candy chronologically.

Note that in the beginning of Candy’s mental letter to Anthony, you can tell Candy was still excited about her trip to Lakewood. After all, her prince had spent his holiday with her and talked to her a lot. Wasn’t that like a date? 😉 This time, Archie and the others weren’t around, and Albert and Candy were alone with each other, walking around the villa premises, going to the beautiful forest, etc. Not to mention spending many hours in the car back and forth! In short, her prince had paid his full attention to her the entire day. That was the birthday wish Candy had requested earlier, wasn’t it? 🙂

Anyway, in her head Candy said to Anthony that she had gone to Lakewood and returned. Then she asked Anthony to guess with whom she had gone. Only then she sadly realized that Anthony had never met Albert in London like his cousins Stear or Archie. That was when she used the following paragraphs introducing Anthony to his young uncle.

Therefore, it’s likely Candy “wrote” this mental letter lying in bed, possibly right after the day trip to Lakewood with Albert. Still feeling thrilled, she reflected the events of the day and started “writing” to Anthony in her head. On the other hand, Candy’s letter to Albert began by telling him that she had worked in Happy Martin Clinic that day and just put the children to bed. Hence, she wrote this long letter before her bedtime, possibly a few days after the trip to Lakewood.

I suppose Mizuki switched the order of Candy’s letters by showing the one to Albert first because the author wanted us to understand why Candy could finally write to Anthony, despite mentally. Besides, Mizuki probably wanted the last letter in her novel to summarize Candy’s three loves as discussed in Optimistic protagonist.

Of course this is merely my own interpretation. 😀

Let’s get back to Candy’s letter to Little Bert. Candy first wrote how happy she was to know about the history of this cute nickname and was now given the privilege to address Albert as such. Candy then called him Little Bert again and again like she would never get tired of it. Soon after that, she described the lovely ride to Lakewood (Wildflowers on the way to Lakewood). Do you know the drive was probably about few hours each way? It wasn’t long, but it wasn’t short either even in today’s standard. Yet, Candy was undoubtedly delighted as Albert sang a Scottish folk song to her while driving. She used the word うっとり (uttori), which means she was fascinated or enraptured by his singing. I think Albert was in a wonderful mood himself.

Moreover, Candy remembered the ride to the Leagans along the same route when she had been thirteen, and now she could hardly believe her dream had come true. She was in the same car with her Prince on the Hill! She sounded so much like his fan and didn’t hide her admiration of her prince.

After walking around the Lakewood villa together, Candy wanted to revisit the forest where Anthony had had his horse accident. For your interest, I have already discussed how Albert helped Candy get over her guilt of causing Anthony’s death in both A memorable embrace and A hug so tight. The passages were well written and very touching. You can sense how grateful Candy was. Despite Terry’s best efforts to force her to forget Anthony, Albert’s loving embrace and tender words had the real healing power. No wonder she said in this letter that she felt that something inside her had revived. I will talk more about that one day. 🙂

In this post, I will focus on Candy’s diary. After coming back from that enchanting forest, Albert brought Candy to the room in the villa where she had discovered his true identity. In the manga, it was the solarium, but in CCFS it wasn’t clear which room it was. Anyway, on the desk in this room, Candy spotted her own diary. In CCFS Volume 2, p. 321:

「これは……きみの大事なものだから」
アルバートさんは窓の外を見つめたまま、つぶやくようにそう言いました。とても静かな声でーーー。
そう、あの日記のほんどがテリィのことばかりです。

While staring out of the window, Albert murmured to Candy in a very quiet voice, “Because this is… your treasure.” Candy acknowledged later in her letter that this diary was mainly about Terry.

In Candy’s unsent letter to Terry (written way before this trip), she had described the diary’s content as shown in CCFS Volume 2, p. 275:

だから、わたしがどんなにテリィのことを……かアルバートさんはわたしくらいよく知っています。
テリィとわたしがどうやって出会ったか、そして、いつの間にか……の、すべてを。

She explained to Terry that Albert had read her diary (as per her own request), so Albert knew as much as she did of how much she … Terry. How she had met Terry and little by little how …, everything about it.

Interestingly, Candy had deliberately avoided using words to describe her passion for Terry even in this letter that she wasn’t going to send. 🙄

Also, in this unsent letter to Terry Candy had indicated neither Albert nor she could bring up the topic of her diary, and I believe this was still true until she saw the diary again in Lakewood. How many years had elapsed since she had left London as a stowaway? Around five years or so? Perhaps Albert had been waiting for Candy to ask about the diary? He didn’t want to talk about it because it was very sensitive or might even re-open her old wounds?

Nevertheless, many people deem the return of her diary the ultimate proof of Albert’s love for Candy. He must have sensed that Candy already had developed some special feelings for him before making his important confession. Otherwise, he could have kept this secret to himself for the rest of his life, right? 😉

After his important confession, Albert and Candy began their correspondence, and by the time Albert drove Candy to Lakewood, I believe he genuinely wanted to find out what really made her happy. Remember I said in A love declaration how Candy had described her love for Terry in her diary? Back then, she had written “I love Terry more than anyone else”, using 大好き (dai-suki).

Therefore, the fact that her diary was now sitting on the desk in the room where she had discovered Albert’s true identity implies that Albert wanted Candy to make a choice between him and Terry. Albert knew for sure Candy wasn’t a gold digger, and she understood who Albert really was after reading his letters. As a young millionaire from a prestigious family and the only descendant to a large inheritance, he had a tremendous workload and responsibilities. Yet, by then, they were no longer merely friends, so would Candy see her future with him? Was she willing to leave her world to be with Albert? Or would she prefer Terry if she could choose?

On the other hand, Albert was deeply in love with Candy himself, and in his letters he was willing to openly share his inner thoughts and growing pain with her in detail, so it was understandable he couldn’t face the verdict without feeling apprehensive or nervous. It was like a kind of fear in the moment just before the doctor gives the verdict of your health conditions.

So Albert murmured in a very quiet voice while facing the window in order not to betray his own emotions. A reader told me that since Albert couldn’t predict how Candy was going to react seeing her diary the first time after all these years, he couldn’t trust himself either how he was going to respond seeing a change in her facial expression. At the same time, he didn’t want to give her pressure. By not making any eye contact, Candy didn’t have to pretend the diary wasn’t important to her anymore or say anything in a haste to try to ease the awkward tension between them in that room. No matter what, Albert wanted Candy to make an honest decision on her own accord. I firmly believe if Candy still loved Terry more than anyone else, Albert would step down.

My reader also said if Albert had regarded himself as Candy’s guardian and only waited all this time until she had recovered from the breakup in New York so that she wouldn’t get upset again getting back her diary, Albert would have stayed by Candy’s side and watched her expressions just to make sure she was alright, like a real parent would do to his or her child.

Or, Albert could have simply returned the diary to Candy at Pony’s Home without driving her all the way to Lakewood. Imagine how much he had to drive that day! 😅

Does this make sense to you? 🙂

You think any of this had escaped Candy’s eyes? She must have sensed his discomfort or unease because other than George, Candy knew Albert better than anyone in the world. As expected, she wrote in her letter the details of what she had observed during the return of her diary.

Based on the rest of this letter, Candy did bring her diary home but hadn’t touched it since. What does that signify? I will continue Part 2 because this post is getting too long, and I’ll also quote some of your comments in Part 2. Please stay tuned. 🙂

For now, I’d like to share with you one of my favorite songs, “More than Words”, written and originally performed by the band Extreme. The song reminds us simply saying “I love you” without the actions to support it doesn’t mean much to anyone. Therefore, we have to do more to show our loved ones that we truly love them as we claim.